Takeaways: Surah Al-Maidah

Ayat 5
Pada masa ini dihalalkan bagi kamu (memakan makanan) yang lazat-lazat serta baik-baik. Dan makanan (sembelihan) orang-orang yang diberikan Kitab itu adalah halal bagi kamu, dan makanan (sembelihan) kamu adalah halal bagi mereka (tidak salah kamu memberi makan kepada mereka). Dan (dihalalkan kamu berkahwin) dengan perempuan-perempuan yang menjaga kehormatannya – di antara perempuan-perempuan yang beriman, dan juga perempuan-perempuan yang menjaga kehormatannya dari kalangan orang-orang yang diberikan Kitab dahulu daripada kamu apabila kamu beri mereka maskahwinnya, sedang kamu (dengan cara yang demikian), bernikah bukan berzina, dan bukan pula kamu mengambil mereka menjadi perempuan-perempuan simpanan. Dan sesiapa yang ingkar (akan syariat Islam) sesudah ia beriman, maka sesungguhnya gugurlah amalnya (yang baik) dan adalah ia pada hari akhirat kelak dari orang-orang yang rugi.

Ayat 45
Dan kami telah tetapkan atas mereka di dalam kitab Taurat itu, bahawa jiwa dibalas dengan jiwa, dan mata dibalas dengan mata, dan hidung dibalas dengan hidung, dan telinga dibalas dengan telinga, dan gigi dibalas dengan gigi, dan luka-luka hendaklah dibalas (seimbang). Tetapi sesiapa yang melepaskan hak membalasnya, maka menjadilah ia penebus dosa baginya; dan sesiapa yang tidak menghukum dengan apa yang telah diturunkan Allah, maka mereka itulah orang-orang yang zalim.

Ayat 51
Wahai orang-orang yang beriman! Janganlah kamu mengambil orang-orang Yahudi dan Nasrani itu sebagai teman rapat, kerana setengah mereka menjadi teman rapat kepada setengahnya yang lain; dan sesiapa di antara kamu yang menjadikan mereka teman rapatnya, maka sesungguhnya ia adalah dari golongan mereka itu mereka itu. Sesungguhnya Allah tidak memberikan petunjuk kepada kaum yang berlaku zalim.

Ayat 61
Dan apabila mereka (orang-orang Yahudi atau munafik itu) datang kepada kamu, mereka berkata: “Kami telah beriman”. Padahal sesungguhnya mereka itu masuk menemui kamu dengan kekufurannya, dan sesungguhnya mereka keluar (dari sisi kamu) dengan kekufurannya juga; dan (hendaklah mereka ingat), Allah lebih mengetahui akan apa yang mereka sembunyikan.

Ayat 64
Dan orang-orang Yahudi itu berkata: “Tangan Allah terbelenggu (bakhil – kikir)”, tangan merekalah yang terbelenggu dan mereka pula dilaknat dengan sebab apa yang mereka telah katakan itu, bahkan kedua tangan Allah sentiasa terbuka (nikmat dan kurniaNya luas melimpah-limpah). Ia belanjakan (limpahkan) sebagaimana yang Ia kehendaki; dan demi sesungguhnya, apa yang telah diturunkan kepadamu dari tuhanmu itu akan menjadikan kebanyakan dari mereka bertambah derhaka dan kufur; dan Kami tanamkan perasaan permusuhan dan kebencian di antara mereka hingga hari kiamat. Tiap-tiap kali mereka menyalakan api peperangan, Allah memadamkannya; dan mereka pula terus-menerus melakukan kerosakan di muka bumi, sedang Allah tidak suka kepada orang-orang yang melakukan kerosakan.

Ayat 72
Demi sesungguhnya! Telah kafirlah orang-orang yang berkata: “Bahawasanya Allah ialah Al-Masih Ibni Maryam”. Padahal Al-Masih sendiri berkata:” Wahai Bani Israil! Sembahlah Allah, Tuhanku dan Tuhan kamu, Bahawasanya sesiapa yang mempersekutukan Allah dengan sesuatu yang lain, maka sesungguhnya Allah haramkan kepadanya Syurga, dan tempat kembalinya ialah neraka; dan tiadalah seorang penolong pun bagi orang-orang yang berlaku zalim”.

Ayat 77
Katakanlah: “Wahai Ahli Kitab! Janganlah kamu melampau dalam ugama kamu secara yang tidak benar, dan janganlah kamu menurut hawa nafsu suatu kaum yang telah sesat sebelum ini dan telah menyesatkan banyak manusia, dan juga (sekarang) mereka telah tersesat (jauh) dari jalan yang betul”

Ayat 87
Wahai orang-orang yang beriman! Janganlah kamu haramkan benda-benda yang baik-baik yang telah dihalalkan oleh Allah bagi kamu, dan janganlah kamu melampaui batas (pada apa yang telah ditetapkan halalnya itu); kerana sesungguhnya Allah tidak suka kepada orang-orang yang melampaui batas.

Ayat 116
Dan (ingatlah) ketika Allah berfirman: “Wahai Isa ibni Maryam! Engkaukah yang berkata kepada manusia: `Jadikanlah daku dan ibuku dua tuhan selain dari Allah? ‘ ” Nabi `Isa menjawab: “Maha Suci Engkau (wahai Tuhan)! Tidaklah layak bagiku mengatakan sesuatu yang aku tidak berhak (mengatakannya). Jika aku ada mengatakannya, maka tentulah Engkau telah mengetahuinya. Engkau mengetahui apa yang ada pada diriku, sedang aku tidak mengetahui apa yang ada pada diriMu; kerana sesungguhnya Engkau jualah Yang Maha Mengetahui perkara-perkara yang ghaib.

Ayat 119-120
Allah berfirman: “Inilah hari (kiamat) yang (padanya) orang-orang yang benar (pada tutur kata dan amal perbuatan) mendapat manfaat dari kebenaran mereka; mereka beroleh Syurga-syurga yang mengalir di bawahnya beberapa sungai, mereka kekal di dalamnya selama-lamanya. Allah reda akan mereka dan mereka pula reda akan Dia. Itulah kejayaan yang amat besar”.
Allah jualah yang menguasai alam langit dan bumi serta segala yang ada padanya; dan Dia lah jua yang Maha Kuasa atas tiap-tiap sesuatu.

Takeaways from Surah An-Nisaa

Ayat 19
Wahai orang-orang yang beriman, tidak halal bagi kamu mewarisi perempuan-perempuan dengan jalan paksaan, dan janganlah kamu menyakiti mereka (dengan menahan dan menyusahkan mereka) kerana kamu hendak mengambil balik sebahagian dari apa yang kamu telah berikan kepadanya, kecuali (apabila) mereka melakukan perbuatan keji yang nyata. Dan bergaulah kamu dengan mereka (isteri-isteri kamu itu) dengan cara yang baik. Kemudian jika kamu (merasai) benci kepada mereka (disebabkan tingkah-lakunya, janganlah kamu terburu-buru menceraikannya), kerana boleh jadi kamu bencikan sesuatu, sedang Allah hendak menjadikan pada apa yang kamu benci itu kebaikan yang banyak (untuk kamu).
Ayat 30
Dan sesiapa berbuat demikian dengan menceroboh dan aniaya, maka kami akan masukkan dia ke dalam api neraka, dan balasan yang sedemikian itu adalah mudah bagi Allah, (tidak ada sesiapapun yang dapat menghalangnya).
Ayat 34-36

Kaum lelaki itu adalah pemimpin dan pengawal yang bertanggungjawab terhadap kaum perempuan, oleh kerana Allah telah melebihkan orang-orang lelaki (dengan beberapa keistimewaan) atas orang-orang perempuan, dan juga kerana orang-orang lelaki telah membelanjakan (memberi nafkah) sebahagian dari harta mereka. Maka perempuan-perempuan yang soleh itu ialah yang taat (kepada Allah dan suaminya), dan yang memelihara (kehormatan dirinya dan apa jua yang wajib dipelihara) ketika suami tidak hadir bersama, dengan pemuliharaan Allah dan pertolonganNya. Dan perempuan-perempuan yang kamu bimbang melakukan perbuatan derhaka (nusyuz) hendaklah kamu menasihati mereka, dan (jika mereka berdegil) pulaukanlah mereka di tempat tidur, dan (kalau juga mereka masih degil) pukulah mereka (dengan pukulan ringan yang bertujuan mengajarnya). Kemudian jika mereka taat kepada kamu, maka janganlah kamu mencari-cari jalan untuk menyusahkan mereka. Sesungguhnya Allah Maha Tinggi, lagi Maha Besar.

Dan jika kamu bimbangkan perpecahan di antara mereka berdua (suami isteri) maka lantiklah “orang tengah” (untuk mendamaikan mereka, iaitu), seorang dari keluarga lelaki dan seorang dari keluarga perempuan. Jika kedua-dua “orang tengah” itu (dengan ikhlas) bertujuan hendak mendamaikan, nescaya Allah akan menjadikan kedua (suami isteri itu) berpakat baik. Sesungguhnya Allah sentiasa Mengetahui, lagi Amat mendalam pengetahuanNya.

Dan hendaklah kamu beribadat kepada Allah dan janganlah kamu sekutukan Dia dengan sesuatu apa jua; dan hendaklah kamu berbuat baik kepada kedua ibu bapa, dan kaum kerabat, dan anak-anak yatim, dan orang-orang miskin, dan jiran tetangga yang dekat, dan jiran tetangga yang jauh, dan rakan sejawat, dan orang musafir yang terlantar, dan juga hamba yang kamu miliki. Sesungguhnya Allah tidak suka kepada orang-orang yang sombong takbur dan membangga-banggakan diri;

Ayat 40
Sesungguhnya Allah tidak sekali-kali menganiaya (seseorang) sekalipun seberat zarah (debu). Dan kalaulah (amal yang seberat zarrah) itu amal kebajikan, nescaya akan menggandakannya dan akan memberi, dari sisiNya, pahala yang amat besar.

Ayat 49-50

Tidakkah engkau perhatikan (dan merasa pelik wahai Muhammad) kepada orang-orang yang membersihkan (memuji) diri sendiri? (Padahal perkara itu bukan hak manusia) bahkan Allah jualah yang berhak membersihkan (memuji) sesiapa yang dikehendakiNya (menurut aturan SyariatNya); dan mereka pula tidak akan dianiaya (atau dikurangkan balasan mereka) sedikitpun.

Lihatlah (wahai Muhammad) betapa beraninya mereka mengada-adakan perkara-perkara dusta terhadap Allah? Dan cukuplah perbuatan itu menjadi dosa yang terang nyata.

Ayat 62-63

Maka bagaimana halnya apabila mereka ditimpa sesuatu kemalangan disebabkan (kesalahan) yang telah dibuat oleh tangan mereka sendiri, kemudian mereka datang kepadamu sambil bersumpah: “Demi Allah, kami tidak sekali-kali menghendaki melainkan kebaikan dan perdamaian (bagi kedua pihak yang berbalah)”.

Mereka itulah orang-orang yang diketahui oleh Allah akan apa yang ada dalam hati mereka, oleh itu berpalinglah engkau daripada mereka, dan nasihatilah mereka, serta katakanlah kepada mereka kata-kata yang boleh memberi kesan pada hati mereka.

Ayat 65

Maka demi Tuhanmu (wahai Muhammad)! Mereka tidak disifatkan beriman sehingga mereka menjadikan engkau hakim dalam mana-mana perselisihan yang timbul di antara mereka, kemudian mereka pula tidak merasa di hati mereka sesuatu keberatan dari apa yang telah engkau hukumkan, dan mereka menerima keputusan itu dengan sepenuhnya.

Ayat 77

Tidakkah engkau (hairan) melihat (wahai Muhammad), akan orang-orang yang (pernah) dikatakan kepada mereka: “Tahanlah tangan kamu (daripada bertindak melancarkan perang yang belum diizinkan), dan dirikanlah sembahyang serta berikanlah zakat”. (Mereka meminta juga hendak berperang), kemudian apabila mereka diperintahkan berperang, tiba-tiba sepuak di antara mereka merasa gerun kepada manusia sama seperti mereka merasa gerun kepada (azab) Allah atau lebih gerun lagi. Lalu mereka (merayu kepada Allah dengan) berkata: “Wahai Tuhan kami, mengapa Engkau wajibkan kami berperang (pada saat ini)? Mengapa Engkau tidak biarkan kami hingga ke tempoh yang singkat (iaitu akhir hayat kami)?” Katakanlah (wahai Muhammad): “Harba benda yang menjadi kesenangan di dunia ini adalah sedikit sahaja, (dan akhirnya akan lenyap), dan (balasan) hari akhirat itu lebih baik lagi bagi orang-orang yang bertaqwa (kerana ia lebih mewah dan kekal selama-lamanya), dan kamu pula tidak akan dianiaya sedikit pun”.

Ayat 111-112

Dan sesiapa yang mengerjakan sesuatu dosa maka sesungguhnya ia hanya mengerjakannya untuk (menjadi bala bencana yang) menimpa dirinya sendiri. Dan (ingatlah) Allah Maha Mengetahui, lagi Maha Bijaksana.

Dan sesiapa yang melakukan suatu kesalahan atau suatu dosa, kemudian ia menuduhnya kepada orang yang tidak bersalah, maka sesungguhnya ia telah memikul kesalahan berbuat dusta, dan melakukan dosa yang amat nyata.

Ayat 128

Dan jika seorang perempuan bimbang akan timbul dari suaminya “nusyuz” (kebencian), atau tidak melayaninya, maka tiadalah salah bagi mereka (suami isteri) membuat perdamaian di antara mereka berdua (secara yang sebaik-baiknya), kerana perdamaian itu lebih baik (bagi mereka daripada bercerai-berai); sedang sifat bakhil kedekut (tidak suka memberi atau bertolak ansur) itu memang tabiat semula jadi yang ada pada manusia. Dan jika kamu berlaku baik (dalam pergaulan), dan mencegah diri (daripada melakukan kezaliman), maka sesungguhnya Allah Maha Mendalam PengetahuanNya akan apa yang kamu lakukan.

Ayat 148

Allah tidak suka kepada perkataan-perkataan buruk yang dikatakan dengan berterus-terang (untuk mendedahkan kejahatan orang); kecuali oleh orang yang dianiayakan. Dan (ingatlah) Allah sentiasa Mendengar, lagi Maha Mengetahui.

Takeaways from Surah Al-i-Imran

Surah Al -i-Imran: Ayat-ayat berikut:
www.alquran-melayu.com/3-al-i-imran

Ayat 16
(Iaitu) orang-orang yang berdoa dengan berkata: “Wahai Tuhan kami! Sesungguhnya kami telah beriman, oleh itu, ampunkanlah dosa-dosa kami dan peliharalah kami dari azab neraka”;
Ayat 17
(Dan juga) orang-orang yang sabar (dalam menjunjung perintah Allah), dan orang-orang yang benar (perkataan dan hatinya), dan orang-orang yang sentiasa taat (akan perintah Allah), dan orang-orang yang membelanjakan hartanya (pada jalan Allah), dan orang-orang yang beristighfar (memohon ampun) pada waktu sahur.
Ayat 26
Katakanlah (wahai Muhammad): “Wahai Tuhan yang mempunyai kuasa pemerintahan! Engkaulah yang memberi kuasa pemerintahan kepada sesiapa yang Engkau kehendaki, dan Engkaulah yang mencabut kuasa pemerintahan dari sesiapa yang Engkau kehendaki. Engkaulah juga yang memuliakan sesiapa yang Engkau kehendaki, dan Engkaulah yang menghina sesiapa yang Engkau kehendaki. Dalam kekuasaan Engkaulah sahaja adanya segala kebaikan. Sesungguhnya Engkau Maha Kuasa atas tiap-tiap sesuatu.
Ayat 30
(Ingatlah) hari (kiamat yang padanya) tiap-tiap seorang akan mendapati apa sahaja kebaikan yang telah dikerjakannya, sedia (dibentangkan kepadanya dalam surat-surat amalnya); dan demikian juga apa sahaja kejahatan yang telah dikerjakannya. (ketika itu tiap-tiap orang yang bersalah) ingin kalau ada jarak yang jauh di antaranya dengan amalnya yang jahat itu. Dan Allah perintahkan supaya kamu beringat-ingat terhadap kekuasaan diriNya (menyeksa kamu). Dan (ingatlah juga), Allah Amat belas kasihan kepada hamba-hambaNya.
Ayat 38
Ketika itu Nabi Zakaria berdoa kepada Tuhannya, katanya:” Wahai Tuhanku! Kurniakanlah kepadaku dari sisiMu zuriat keturunan yang baik; sesungguhnya Engkau sentiasa Mendengar (menerima) doa permohonan”.
Ayat 66
Ingatlah! Kamu ini orang-orang (bodoh), kamu telah memajukan bantahan tentang perkara yang kamu ada pengetahuan mengenainya (yang diterangkan perihalnya dalam Kitab Taurat), maka mengapa kamu membuat bantahan tentang perkara yang tidak ada pada kamu sedikit pengetahuan pun bersabit dengannya? Dan (ingatlah), Allah mengetahui (hakikat yang sebenarnya) sedang kamu tidak mengetahuinya.
Ayat 70
Wahai Ahli Kitab! Mengapa kamu kufurkan (ingkarkan) ayat-ayat keterangan Allah padahal kamu menyaksikan kebenaranNya?
Ayat 71
Wahai Ahli Kitab! Mengapa kamu campur adukkan yang benar dengan yang salah, dan kamu pula menyembunyikan kebenaran padahal kamu mengetahuinya?
Ayat 86
Bagaimana Allah akan memberi petunjuk hidayah kepada sesuatu kaum yang kufur ingkar sesudah mereka beriman, dan juga sesudah mereka menyaksikan bahawa Rasulullah (Nabi Muhammad) itu adalah benar, dan telah datang pula kepada mereka keterangan-keterangan yang jelas nyata. Dan (ingatlah), Allah tidak akan memberikan petunjuk hidayahNya kepada kaum yang zalim.
Ayat 87
Mereka itu balasannya ialah bahawa mereka ditimpa laknat Allah dan malaikatNya sekalian orang-orang (yang beriman).
Ayat 88
Mereka kekal di dalamnya, tidak diringankan azab seksa daripada mereka dan mereka pula tidak diberi tempoh atau perhatian;
Ayat 99
Katakanlah: “Wahai Ahli Kitab! Mengapa kamu menghalangi orang-orang yang beriman daripada menurut jalan jalan (ugama Islam), kamu hendak menjadikan jalan Allah itu bengkok terpesong, padahal kamu menyaksikan (kebenarannya)? “Dan (ingatlah), Allah tidak sekali-kali lalai akan apa yang kamu lakukan.
Ayat 108
Itulah ayat-ayat keterangan Allah, kami bacakan dia kepadamu (wahai Muhammad) dengan benar. Dan (ingatlah), Allah tidak berkehendak melakukan kezaliman kepada sekalian makhlukNya.
Ayat 111
Mereka (kaum Yahudi dan Nasrani) tidak sekali-kali akan membahayakan kamu, kecuali menyakiti (perasaan kamu dengan ejekan dan tuduhan yang tidak berasas). Dan jika mereka memerangi kamu, mereka akan berpaling lari membelakangkan kamu (kalah dengan sehina-hinanya); sesudah itu mereka tidak akan mencapai kemenangan.
Ayat 120
Kalau kamu beroleh kebaikan (kemakmuran dan kemenangan, maka yang demikian) menyakitkan hati mereka; dan jika kamu ditimpa bencana, mereka bergembira dengannya. Dan kalau kamu sabar dan bertaqwa, (maka) tipu daya mereka tidak akan membahayakan kamu sedikitpun. Sesungguhnya Allah meliputi pengetahuanNya akan apa yang mereka lakukan.
Ayat 140
Jika kamu (dalam peperangan Uhud) mendapat luka (tercedera), maka sesungguhnya kaum (musyrik yang mencerobohi kamu) itu telah (tercedera juga dan) mendaapat luka yang sama (dalam peperangan Badar). Dan demikian itulah keadaan hari-hari (dunia ini dengan peristiwa-peristiwa kemenangan atau kekalahan), kami gilirkan dia antara sesama manusia, (supaya menjadi pengajaran) dan supaya nyata apa yang diketahui Allah tentang orang-orang yang tetap beriman (dan yang sebaliknya), dan juga supaya Allah menjadikan sebahagian di antara kamu orang-orang yang mati Syahid. Dan (ingatlah), Allah tidak suka kepada orang-orang yang zalim.
Ayat 145
Dan (tiap-tiap) makhluk yang bernyawa tidak akan mati melainkan dengan izin Allah, iaitu ketetapan (ajal) yang tertentu masanya (yang telah ditetapkan oleh Allah). Dan (dengan yang demikian) sesiapa yang menghendaki balasan dunia, kami berikan bahagiannya dari balasan dunia itu, dan sesiapa yang menghendaki balasan akhirat, kami berikan behagiannya dari balasan akhirat itu; dan Kami pula akan beri balasan pahala kepada orang-orang yang bersyukur.
Ayat 153
(Ingatlah) ketika kamu berundur lari dan tidak menoleh kepada sesiapa pun, sedang Rasulullah (yang masih berjuang dengan gagahnya) memanggil kamu dari kumpulan yang tinggal di belakang kamu (untuk berjuang terus tetapi kamu tidak mematuhinya). Oleh sebab itu Allah membalas kamu (dengan peristiwa) yang mendukacitakan (kekalahan), dengan sebab perbuatan (kamu menderhaka) yang mendukacitakan (Rasulullah) itu, supaya kamu tidak bersedih hati akan apa yang telah luput dari kamu, dan tidak (pula bersedih) akan apa yang menimpa kamu. Dan (ingatlah), Allah Maha Mengetahui dengan mendalam akan apa jua yang kamu lakukan.
Ayat 160
Jika Allah menolong kamu mencapai kemenangan maka tidak ada sesiapa pun yang akan dapat mengalahkan kamu; dan jika Ia mengalahkan kamu, maka siapakah yang akan dapat menolong kamu sesudah Allah (menetapkan yang demikian)? Dan (ingatlah), kepada Allah jualah hendaknya orang-orang yang beriman itu berserah diri.
Ayat 182
(Azab seksa) yang demikian itu ialah disebabkan perbuatan yang – telah dilakukan oleh tangan kamu sendiri. Dan (ingatlah), sesungguhnya Allah tidak sekali-kali berlaku zalim kepada hamba-hambanya.”
Ayat 188
Jangan sekali-kali engkau menyangka (wahai Muhammad, bahawa) orang-orang yang bergembira dengan apa yang mereka telah lakukan, dan mereka pula suka dipuji dengan apa yang mereka tidak lakukan – jangan sekali-kali engkau menyangka mereka akan terselamat dari seksa, dan mereka pula akan beroleh azab yang tidak terperi sakitnya.
Ayat 192
Wahai Tuhan kami! Sebenarnya sesiapa yang Engkau masukkan ke dalam neraka maka sesungguhnya Engkau telah menghinakannya, dan orang-orang yang zalim tidak akan beroleh seorang penolong pun;

My takeaways from Surah Al Baqarah

Verses in Malay

1) (Iaitu) orang-orang yang apabila ditimpa oleh sesuatu kesusahan, mereka berkata: "Sesungguhnya kami adalah kepunyaan Allah dan kepada Allah jualah kami kembali." yang beriman itu lebih cinta (taat) kepada Allah.

2) Dan kalaulah orang-orang yang melakukan kezaliman (syirik) itu mengetahui ketika mereka melihat azab pada hari akhirat kelak, bahawa sesungghnya kekuatan dan kekuasaan itu semuanya tertentu bagi Allah, dan bahawa sesungguhnya Allah maha berat azab seksaNya.(nescaya mereka tidak melakukan kezaliman)

3) Dan bunuhlah mereka ( musuh yang memerangi kamu) di mana sahaja kam dapati mereka, dan usirlah mereka dari tempat yang mereka telah mengusir kamu; dan (ingatlah bahawa angkara) fitnah itu lebih besar bahayanya daripada pembunuhan dan janganlah kamu memerangi mereka di sekitar masjid Al-Haraam sehingga mereka memerangi kamu di situ. Oleh itu kalau mereka memerangi kamu (di situ), maka bunuhlah mereka. Demikianlah balasan bagi orang-orang kafir.

4) Kemudian jika mereka berhenti memerangi kamu ( aka berhentilah kamu); kerana sesungguhnya Allah Maha Pengampun, lagi Maha Mengasihani.

5) Adakah patut kamu menyangka bahawa kamu akan masuk syurga, padahal belum sampai kepada kamu (ujian dan cubaan) seperti yang telah berlaku kepada orang-orang terdahulu daripada kamu? Mereka telah ditimpa kepapaan (kemusnahan harta benda) dan serangan penyakit, serta digoncangkan (oleh ancaman bahaya musuh), sehingga berkatalah Rasul dan orang-orang beriman yang ada bersamanya: Bilakah (datangnya) pertolongan Allah?" Ketahuilah sesungguhnya pertolongan Allah itu dekat (asalkan kamu bersabar dan berpegang teguh kepada ugama Allah).

6) (Dan janganlah kamu jadikan nama) Allah dalam sumpah kamu sebagai benteng yang menghalangi kamu daripada berbuat baik dan bertaqwa, serta mendamaikan perbalahan antara sesama manusia. Dan (ingatlah) Allah sentiasa mendengar, lagi sentiasa mengetahui.

7) Allah tidak memberati seseorang melainkan apa yang terdaya olehnya. Ia mendapat pahala kebaikan yang diusahakannya, dan ia juda menanggung dosa kejahatan yang diusahakannya. (Mereka berdoa dengan berkata): "Wahai Tuhan kami! Janganlah Engkau mengirankan kami salah jika kami lupa atau kami tersalah. Wahai Tuhan kami! Janganlah Engkau bebankan kepada kami bebanan yang berat sebagaimana yang telah Engkau bebankan kepada orang-orang yang terdahulu daripada kami. Whai Tuhan kami! Janganlah Engkau pikulkan kepada kami apa yang kami tidak terdaya memikulnya. Dan maafkanlah kesalahan kami, serta ampunkanlah dosa kami,. Engkaulah Penolong kami; oleh itu, tolonglah kami untuk mencapai kemenangan terhadap kaum-kaum kafir."

What if

What if we will be happy together?
We might be blissful
What if we end up unhappy?
We might settle the issues and make our promise to stay together
What if things turn ugly?
We will be patient to overcome every obstacle together

For better and worst
We will not be apart

I love you

I love how we met
At the mosque
What a sight

I love our first date
At Pasir Ris
With the excuse of exchanging photos

I love spending time with you
Hours of chatting and telling about our life

You sincerity makes me fall for you
You filled my heart with love
It felt like bursting

I love you, that will never change
If you left, I would definitely be derange

My Heart to you

God gave us two hands, two eyes,
A pair of everything
Except for our heart
Coz He knows there will be another heart
That will bind the ties

Your heart is binded to mine
Already in a twine
It is already in the month of nine
I promise this love to the shrine
Despite the typhoon that comes to thine

Although my whine
I know in ten years time
This relationship will be like wine
Always beautiful with the dine

Truth

All I know is I love you
And I am willing to try everything new
You have become my beau
With the cue

The tears that fall are like dew
The logs in my heart which you hew
And the love you brew

After spending the time to woo
You left without a clue
Too much for me to chew
And I fell into a flu

My heart to you is like glue
I dont know how much to show you how true
But the amount of love I have for is not for a spew
But it is just for you

What to me

What to me is an existence

Is showing signs of extinction

Despite the resistance

This heart of mine is telling me persistance

All I needed is acceptance

Despite the circumstance


This hesitant

Shows how love is not consistent

Empty Dreams

The day is empty without you by my side
I dont know how much I have cried
But these tears will not be dried
It is not just about pride
Or the fright
No, It is fear of losing you by my side

This feelings I have for you I cant hide

As much as I might

But you come to me every night

And said you are not taking me for a ride

This emptiness is so tight

Coz I have been dreaming of becoming your bride

As much as I tried

I cant believe the love you have for me just died

God

What did I do to deserve this?
Before I go ahead with him, I did seek your blessings through the prayer
I may have forgotten you for a moment,
However, I seek you again
Coz I knew with you by my side,
My relationship will be blessed

But when he saw me close to you,
He said I am not true
He said I have been fooling him
But doesnt he know being close to you
Makes me feel more love for him?

I want to scream and ask
Why my life is destined in dusk
This blackness has surround my soul
And created a hole
In my heart he stole

I wish things are different
Coz I know for certain
I would not want to be burnt
For the love I have is pure and true
Despite all that I had gone through

Will you let him come back
Will he succumb the crack
I know the concern
Especially after what he has happen

His cold feet or not
Im not too hot
Coz this love which I cant abort
Because it Is a lot

Runaways

An open window,
an empty glass,
a piece of paper wrapped in lace.

One step, two step, three steps, four.
I run across the bedroom and to the door.
Paper in one hand,
piece of lace in the other;
I run out to the field searching for my other.

Evocative scents of distant memories tease my senses driving me insane,
witless and anxious.

Paper in one hand,
piece of lace in the other;
thoughts running wild as I mutter:
“Not again! Not him, not here,
please God not again.

”Paper in one hand,
piece of lace in the other;
thoughts running wild as I mutter: “
Where have you gone my star and sun? ”

Running and searching my eyes drowned in despair,
yelling and calling,
out for the one not there
In despair

Please God,
Return him to me.

Angel

Is this who I really am?
Am I the girl you wished me to be?
Am I strong as u thought I would be?
Am I brave as should be?
Is this who I really am?
Reaching am I too high?
Living in a castle in the sky,
What if I were to fall,
What if I were to cry?
Then will I still be who you thought me to be,
Will your love by my tears wash away,
And leave me in endless stray?
Or will you catch me and show me how love should be?
Spread your wings my Angel for our love is forever free,

This is who I really am,
This is who I will always be,
Found myself in your arms and forever I’ll be
This is who I really am;
In love with thee

Cinta ku selamanya

Ku tahu semua tiada yg sempurna
Tetapi cintaku tak akan terhapuskan sudah
Jalan kita masih panjang
Ku ingin kau selalu disini

aku terlanjur cinta kepadamu
dan tlah kuberikan seluruh hatiku
tapi mengapa baru kini kau pertanyakan cintaku

malam menangis membasahi mata hatiku
aku pun tak mengerti apa yang terjadi
apa salah dan kurang ku padamu
Aku sangat mencintai mu
karna sekali cinta, aku tetap cinta

Biar cinta kita tumbuh harum mewangi
Dan dunia menjadi saksinya
Untuk apa kita membuang-buang waktu
Dengan kata kata perpisahan

Demi cinta kita aku akan menjaga
Cinta kita yg telah kita bina
Walau hari terus berganti hari
Cinta kita abadi selamanya

Ku ingin kau selalu disini
Dan aku bersama dengan mu

Demi cinta kita aku akan menjaga
Cinta kita yg telah kita bina
ku tak boleh hidup tanpamu
AKu hanya dapat mengatakan apa yg kurasa
Ku menangis... membayangkan

Kau pergi meninggalkan diriku
biarkan waktu teruslah berputar
ku cintai kamu penuh rasa sabarku ikhlas tuk bertahan
Jangan tinngalkan akuOh sayangku
Kerana tanpa mu

kekecewaanku sungguh tak berarah
Bagaimana harus aku bertahan
jangan pernah kau berubah
tak relakan yang indah hilanglah sudah
Kerana cinta ku kepada mu amat mendalam rasanya

Hollow

This hollow part of my heart
Keeps yearning for you
I believe this relationship we have
Will be beautiful if this storm passes us

However I cant do much on my side
If you continue to fight
Going against what is true in your heart

This relationship has reached its peak
To end it with a click
Would just mean syaitan has succeeded
In coming in between to us
By us admitting defeat
After all the sacrifices and learning point we have met

This ehart that beat
Feels your heat
Loing you with every fire that lit

Our life story

Jan 1 was when we first met
Friendship was the furthest I thought we would get
We never knew when the first date was set
We will end in our little net

I used to think love was an illusion
Ours, was no exception
However the cupid hits our hearts
And I reached the stage we cant be apart

You love, my darling has brought joy and laughter
To very inch of my heart and soul
With every passing yard

I believe Allah has created you for me
He chose you from the rest
Coz he knows you will bring the best

From this day forward
I have truly shared this promise
That forever and always,
I will love you

Unpredictability of Life

Life is so unpredictable
Changes in inevitable
I dont know what happened
But this sudden change made my world upside down
I dont know exactly what it is
But there is something really special about you

It might be just a surface
And you might hurt me later
But the qualities you have
Your big heart, capabilities and smile
Made everyone admire the love I have for you
You soul has connected to my heart
And the person you really are
I hope to know more each day

I receive so much joy just being able to see you smile
And everytime you tell me, I love you
It made my heart jumped with joy
If I ever figure out the magic that makes you special
It is a combination of everything
You are a rare combination of many special things
Coz you are just amazing.

Inside me there is where my sweetest dream resides
Where my feelings are kept
And where memories of us safely locked
To keep me warm each day
When you are not near me

Sometimes I bring you there purposely
Just to make my day brighter
But more often,
I feel the thoughts of you finds its way naturally

There are times when I am awakened
And realize you are part of my dream
Then during the day when I allow my imagination to run wild
It takes me to your arms and your embrace
It allows me to linger there knowing there is no where else I'd choose to be

I know my thoughts are just my reflection
But it keeps taking me to you

Only the most special things in my world gets to to come inside my heart and stay
I realized hiw deeply my life is with you

14 June

I used to think love does not exist,
I used to believe that it has ceased
But when you came into my live
It made me go for the dive

U realised not only of its existence
But the purity it could offer
I see you patience
It made me softer

I used to say my heart is hollow
But when you invited me with your friendship
You filled it till its not low

The Agony

I thought I wont have to face anymore agony,
But I was wrong.
This pain, this time round,
Is worst than I ever had before.
Coz this love I have
Is much stronger than before.

Think

I am not unhappy about the past
But I do wish to go into the past
I am okay with the present
But it doesnt mean I want to stay in it!

I dont look forward to the future
But look forward to the opportunities
I dont wish for changes
But I do not want to be stagnant

I don't know what I want
Coz I am evolving
My mind keeps changing
I want to stay the same
But yet, I want to be different

Him

Came when loneliness conquers the heart
Filled the empitiness with smiles
The time and moments are gone
Where sadness comes and goes

Treasures the moments together
And dream of the time to come
When she doesnt have to be alone
And he will swept her by

Will there be such time
She never knows
As she lives to know of the crime
That when SHE mimes
He will treat her like foes
And leave the past like throwing a dime.

A poem

It is gone,
Gone by the wind
As the day goes by,
It is shattered
With it, the dream passes by.

It is gone,
The day I remembered,
Seems to be empty
Yet with the ease
It flows.

It is gone,
The dreams are away,
But yet, the memory stays
With it, I treasured.

A Ray of Hope

THe last month has been super taxing for me. It definitely helped to get my life at the backseat as I was swamped with work. It als, however, allowed me to reflect about life, mine to be precise. Why hope and dream when it is wasted? Why waste the life when you are still living. I see a ray of hope in my life. A friend likes to tell me B-positive. Irony isnt it? Even in that there's a negative (-) sign. But according to him, if life is too perfect, you'd be bored and knowing you, you'd be miserable after a too perfect life...Hmmm...Yeah, a sad optimist, indeed a great oxymoron for someone like me. But yeah, due to the stress level and prolly humidity and all thats happening in my life, I had rashes. And yeah, due to the sleepless nights because of the itch, I started thinking....yeah, Im a cancer, so Im a thinker! I started thinking why should I worry and be sad so much of everything that goes wrong. Have I forgotten Murphy's Law? Anything that can go wrong will go wrong, especially if I am involved..haha...well...thats the sad optimist talking...definitely. But yeah, with all these things that happened, I reflected the past year. I am calmer, Im more patient, I take things with a stride and I value life much much more than anyone could ever imagine and more importantly, I love what I am doing and I am beginning to learn to be happy, despite of Murphy's Law acting its force on me! So yeah I am B-ing positive, whatever it takes, positivity, here I come at strong speed!

Fishing

Last weekend, I went to East Coast. At East Coast jetty, I saw many people fishing, yeah...interesting indeed....so many people, men and women, young and old very much occupied with the activity. Anyway, that aside, I saw something disturbing. After they caught the fish, these people left the fish to die on shore....instead of ending the fishes' life immediately. Off course, me, being me, commented a lot of things to my friend who was also there about the cruelty. Just imagine if these people had to go through that! I must say, if you want to fish, there are 2 ways you can do it, either kill it once and for all or put the fishes in water, at least, it wont be gasping for air....it was such a sad sight....how can they be eating those fishes they left to die like that...spare a thought!

The Event

King of fruits: Durian

What else would it be then? With its unique odour, and thorn covered husk, this fruit is indeed heaven, at least to most people. I think it comes from the malay word 'duri', which means thorns, it is rather pricky. This fruit can be rather powerful as its smell. I am not sure of the fact, but it is claimed to be 'heaty' and can cause excessive perspiration. To counteract that, there is a certain claim of pouring water on the shell after the pulp is taken out and drinking the water after consuming the durian.

It is also not advisable to have durians with beer, I am not sure the reason for that though since I dont drink and I rarely take durians.

But what I am unsure is why is durian smelly? Well here is the tale behind the smelly durian...http://everything2.com/title/Why+the+Durian+is+Smelly. However, I couldnt find the scientific reason for its awful smell...would love to know the answer to that!

New Encounters, Old Pain

Its scary how things are so similar
But yet so different

Its alarming that old wounds are opened
And I am the cause of it!

Its shocking how things evolve
From light to emotional

Its frightening if you can't face the fact
When I made a spectacle of myself

Its definitely myseterious
How life deters us from living

Its haunting if the past hunts us
And we died because of what happened to our 'former' life

Its difficult to let go of the past
But we must and we have to
Thats the only way we can start living
And we can move ahead

New Memories, Old ones

Well, wonder how it would be like if it didnt change
Imagine life to be different
Disturbing as it seems
Those thoughts visited me

It could have been different
But destiny as it is
Has arranged it to be this
And the flow of life follows

Imagine if things were different
Had it been this or that?
Will it be?
No, it wont!
So we must move on

Keep on walking ahead
Off course slow steps
Snails in fact
But it will be a success
If you try
It will only be a failure
If you stop living
Coz your heart doesnt stop breathing
Just because the person is not there!

If Tomorrow Never Comes

If tomorrow never comes,
I would want to live to the fullest.

If tomorrow never comes,
I want to be uplifted.

Happiness will give me strength
Happiness gives me a purpose
But happiness is rare

I thought I would not have survived!

I thought when it's over,
I'd be dead
I thought I would not be able to survive the ordeal
It was too painful

But I managed to live
I survived!
Though I'm scarred by the past,
I am moving on.

I am a better me today,
I don't live for yesterday no more.
Today is precious,
And tomorrow I'd build my future.

I have erased yesterday's memory
And fill it with today's dreams
I may still have my woes and worry,
But one thing for sure,
I have found a new me!
A new stronger me!
I can survive anything,
I am back from the world of dead,
To stay alive!

A Meeting with a Pyscho

It was definitely a scary meeting. The day started of as usual. It was the day before my exam, last Tuesday to be precise. I went to the Community Centre, as usual, to study. Mas came along as we had planned to study together. An hour plus after, a psycho went into the study room. He definitely looked like a psycho, the way he slammed the door and pressed the buttons on the aircon controller. Mas and I smiled in agreement but we didnt say anything. About 10 minutes later, as Mas and I were about to discuss on one of the questions on the mock exam paper, the guy came and shouted to us, "Can you two girls shut up? I would appreciate it if you two shut up!" He did that at the top of his voice. Then Mas, who is definitely a fighter, started to point out the fact that he lowered down the temperature at 16 degrees when everyone else was feeling cold. He said, "I don't care. I am feeling hot." So what Mas did? She went towards the controller and increased the temperature. Next thing that happened was a push from the pyscho. He pushed he hard I must say. Mas started getting really angry and an argument started. Then in the midst of it, Mas showed him how hard he pushed her, though I must say, not that I am siding her, her push wasnt as hard as his. When Mas pushed him, he suddenly lunged towards her and strangled her on her neck. I was too shock to react. But after getting back my composure, I pulled him from his back, worried that he could cause harm to my friend. He pushed me aside and brushed his long fingers on my arm which resulted with a scratch on my arm. Then we started screaming. By then another girl who was at the study room had gone down to report the case to the staff. We decided to report this nutcase to the police. We went down as well, with him screaming names and vulgarities at us. As we knew we had no time with police report and all, we decided to let the CC called the policce instead.

About 15 to 20 minutes later, the police came and took our statements. Apparently they could not arrest him as it is under involuntary cause of hurt or something along that line. Then, the policewoman even told my friend that she is at fault as she retaliated. As we are tide up with our revision and could not waste time, we decided not to press charges. The crazy dude is freed. However, the CC gave out a letter to inform him that he could not enter the premise again. At least, somehow, at least something was done.

I was rather taken aback by a few things here, first how the authority, in this case, the police reacted to the case. They placed everything in a matter of factly, without considering how we could have felt at that moment, especially after such traumatic incident.

Another issue I was disappointed was how a friend reacted. I mean, if you tell this to anyone, they would not think its funny as it is indeed, not funny. But this friend of mine, laughed and made a joke out of it, which made me pissed. Really showed, how much a friend I am to the person!

The story: Nurkasih

Well, the synopsis of the drama is, guy strayed out of the religion in the parents (to the dad) and arrange the son to marry a religious gal of the father's choice, though both the gal and the guy were against the marriage and the guy has a gal back in Australia and the gal has an uncompleted dreams...it makes me reflect how selfish parents can be. Yes, I agree they want the best for their children, however, if your child thinks another person is right for her, accept her and not give him options which are dead end for him. I dont understand why parents in modern society react in this manner. Yes, true, this is just a story, but it is a reflection of the asian community, especially some minority groups who think very highly of their clans or groups, which to me is just stupidity. What the parents only ruin is their child's happiness and the other party who si with the child. Well, maybe its easier to look it from my view and give my comments as such as I am not a parent myself. Maybe I will never understand such circumstances and conditions as I have not reach to a point where I need to 'help' my child (if ever I have any) decide what would be good or bad for him/her. But at least, at this point of time, I am sure I will allow my child decides for himself or herself what would make the child happy. And will not give stupid conditions where I know the child has no choice but to accede to my demands.

Mani and Pedi session

Today is another manicure and pedicure session for me....I just realised that I have been going to the place a tiny bit too many times this month, wonder why....boredom I suppose! But today I have pretty nails....but now one of my big toes is spoilt...sob sob!

Liliput

Whee...I had a fantababulous time at Liliput yesterday. Well, in case you don't know what the hell that is, its miniature golf. And the best part, I won over my friends. Shhh....can't tell them..hahaha. Well, its one game I am definitely better than them, this is it. But, I did faced a few challenges, like going uphill. The ball refused to go uphill. My score would have been much better on flat ground. Well, its a start. Maybe I am fated to play golf....hmmm....maybe I should learn it professionally...haha...well...someone told me once, dream big..I think this is just fantasy on my part..lol!

The Karaoke Session That didnt happen

Yesterday, Ju, Mas, Nur and I had planned to go karaokeing before a boardgame session. But did it happen?! Nope, Nur called me at 5 pm to tell me she has overslept...when I called her at 430 for a meeting at 6. Hmmm...then Mas had an argument and keep saying she was on the way...just say you cant make it, not on the way when you are not! Thats how I feel!

Food glorious food

Last Friday was really FOOD DAY! My buddies and I had a whole lot of food, just the 3 of us with 5 dishes in front of us. We ate so much that I had skipped dinner and breakfast the next day. We had orange chicken, black pepper crab, baby kailan, seafood tomyam and beancurd hotplate. Its cheap! All the dishes with rice and all was 40 bucks...pretty cheap for a spread. And yeshie, we finished mostly all the food on the table!

Feelings

I have been feeling useless lately. I dont know why. I have been looking my the purpose in my life but yet I find no answers to it. It is scary what I thought of doing. There are many things I want to do and planned to do but all that dashed 3 to 4 months ago. Too bad, I have realised one thing through all these, nothing happens when you planned, everything seems to fumble, especially so for me. Its probably my luck. The one thing that keep me going is my work, even then some parents think I am not an efficient educator. Where they had heard it will remain a mystery but if I could share it with them, I work extremely hard for my students. Ive been doing so and I can safely say, I may not be the best teacher, Im definitely not a bad one.

The Long "Awaited" Holiday

Normally, I would look forward to holidays, always excited and gearing and planning for holidays and spending time with different people who are significant in my life. But this year, somewhat a big part of me is taken away and it makes me feel empty. Lucky for me, I have many nice people who are around who have made life a little bit easier, my colleagues whom Im spending a fair bit of time with, my buddies who are always around when I need to rant or when certain things make me depress and for the friend who is willing to hear and endure my nonsense though my views and wishes are very much against you choice in life. I have talked about weirdest issue about life as I look at life in a more microscopic view these days, it even scares me sometimes.

Time when I need you most

At the beginning,
I was looking forward to it
Spending those moments
But now that its near
With the empitiness within me
Its just a pain
To even realise its approaching

I know I'd feel miserable
I wish it could just pass
As without the purpose
The meaning is gone

Discovery

Today I found out a friend reads my blog...well...if you are reading it now, Ive told you my blog was a bore and it still is. WHat I am curious is how you find out about my blog....hmmm...Im pretty sure I never tell the url..genius indeed...im sure you are gloating and nodding in agreement right now...haha. Anyway, thanks for spending the time with me. And ya, I have been eating, in fact, Im a glutton now...hehe

Random

Ambiguity

Billowing in sorrow

Crying for the unworthy

Decadent

Effort gone wasted

For all is gone

Giving so much

Had gone too far

Imagining the happiness

Jumping into darkness

Keeping the past in the heart

Lamenting to others

Mourning in pain

Neither here nor there

Or just beneath the stars

Piling the sadness

Quilting the pain

Resting but yet yearning

Starting anew

Trying but to no avail

Unimaginable ending

Victory was expected

Won't that be sweet

Yet everything gone

Zealous no more

Tidak ku Duga

Aku bukan seorang pujangga
Yang bijak berkata-kata
Tapi bila hati terluka
Dengan sesuatu yang tak ku rela
Hatiku mula mencacar

Alunan suara terngiang di telinga
Kerana ini acar kehidupan
Yang tidak akan pernah sempurna
Tapi mengapa aku yang menerima
Sedangkan aku setia
Dan tidak berubah

Inikah yang harus aku terima
Aku sudah mencuba
Untuk melupakan semua
Tetapi Dia membuatnya susah
Dengan pertemuan yang tidak ku duga
Mengapa?

Adakah ini yang dinamakan dugaan
Tetapi aku tidak mahu diduga
Sedemian rupa
Kerana terasa tersiksa
Dan bertanya kepadaNya
Apakah motif sebenarnya
Kerana ujian ini tidak dapat ku terima

What is an SPG

Today, someone said I am dressed like an SPG...hmmm....I am not offended, but I just wanna highlight I don't qualify as one. I just felt like dressing up and looking and feeling good...havent been feeling good about life for a bit and trying to make myself as happy as I can be.

Anyway, what equates to being an SPG? As I am certain I dont look like one, I went to a few websites to check out what's the criteria of being one? Haha (too free...actually I have tons of work to do) :)

What is an SPG?

It means a local girl who will ONLY go out with a white guy (which I don't), be he's old, bald, ugly or whatsoever. SPG's objective is to date or hook a white guy (which I don't). It's not mainly due to money factor (which I don't), although there're some who do want rich white guys, but mostly it's based on biased thinking that whites are better than the rest (hmmm...trust me...I don't think that way...but shall not explain further). SPG girls commonly speak in fake accents (which I don't), be it American, British or Aussie. Other traits of these girls are long hair (mine is short)and clad in sexy clothes (my clothes are decent enough).

I definitely don't date for status, money, or better whatever....I don't need that...I spend my own keep...

For the person who said that...don't worry...I am not offended...just need to highlight I am not and dont belong to that category. In fact, I don't fit the important criteria, that is SPGs are suppose to be attractive and I am not at all attractive....I am just a plain Jane :)

Why not me

Walk alone
Held hands

Pretending happiness
Truly blissed

Succumb with fear
Filled with joy

Tears running dry
Smiled and glowed

Bleeding heart
Blown away

If only the perfect ending was such
But it had to be reversed!
Rather have hurt then happiness
Really no surprise
How it turned out
Half expected
End
For it is damned, lost and forgotten!

Lifeless

Easing the pain
Taking the norms
Praying for unreal
Following grace
High above

Wasted chance
Unjustifiable dreams
Useless prayers
Running through the blades

Wimp is out
Cry no more
Despair
And loneliness
One can't bear

Pills taken
Spirit gone
For confusion begins
In that shattered dreams

Darkness

Snapping out?
Arduous
Darkness
Uphill
Charging
Unlikely
Resembling
Sadly
Neglect
Definite
Blackness
Surrounds
Insanity
Weirdly
Pain
Consumes
Grims
Begin

Self-Destruction

Predefined circumstances
No compromise
Free the mind
Of thinking
And go beyond the obvious

The train was running
Without an ending
Still catching
Only to destructing

Crafted
And laid upon
The destined
Of hell
Decides

Merely something
Beyond the boundaries
Unsettled
Unfulfilled

Concealing
But yet revealing
Images of life
Floundering

Something burning
Pain yearning
Silence to discerning

Shadowing the past
Grasping
But only loneliness reveals

Unwell MatchBox 20

All day
Staring at the ceiling
Making friends with shadows on my wall
All night
Hearing voices telling me
That I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good for something

Hold on
I'm feeling like
I'm headed for a
Breakdown
I don't know why

I'm not crazy,
I'm just a little unwell
I know, right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me

I'm not crazy,
I'm just a little impaired
I know, right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be
Me
Talking to myself in public

Dodging glances on the train
I know
I know they've all been talking 'bout me
I can hear them whisper
And it makes me think there must be something wrong
With me
Out of all the hours thinking
Somehow
I've lost my mind

I'm not crazy,
I'm just a little unwell
I know, right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me

I'm not crazy,
I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be

I been talking in my sleep
Pretty soon they'll come to get me
Yeah, they're taking me away

I'm not crazy,
I'm just a little unwell
I know, right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me

I'm not crazy
I'm just a little impaired
I know, right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be

Hey, how I used to be
How I used to be, yeah
Well I'm just a little unwell
How I used to be
How I used to be

Today

Today you came into my dream again
But your memory is now faint
No longer daint

I cant changed the fate
Or my birthdate
And I'll bate

For them I shall stay strong
For you who did me wrong
And stab me with a prong

I don't know what the future jells
Will there be wedding bells
I know I have gone through hell
And this time when I fell
I fell into a deep cell
I tried to yell
But you left me in the well
Wailing to the ell

You showed how much you dont care
When you say your love is just not there
Those whords I couldn't bare
To hear I do not dare
For I dont think it is fair
Coz its clear like a glare
With all your stare
That your love for me was there
Maybe I refuse to admit the blare
That you treated me like a ware
I should flare
And not easily declare
That you've put me in this tare

Story of my Life

You came into my life about nine years ago
The war memorial was where we first met
A slight of dislike on my first encounter I forgo
And continue the friendship I let

Remain friends, we did
Somehow we went on a bid
I met new people but they ended
But remain friends and never bended
Somehowthe fire between us lid

We became closer
We did a lot of things together
Though at times, I know I could be treated better
Somehow I just let that love grew deeper

Several outings and dates
Though you never want to show
In public your feelings about me
An affair, I felt with you

But again, things changed
Your affections were more readily
You were willing to meet my friends
We spent our new year together, watching the flashes of fireworks

I was hopeful that things were looking better
We were moving in tanderm
Marriage was also a topic of conversation
Then an ultimatum was made

Talked to your mum you did
And strong disapproval she made
Instead of fighting for me
Giving me up totally you did

You told me "I dont love you"
Even if get married, we will end up in a divorce
You treat me like a sis
My life became a hiss

From that confident someone
I fell into depression
Work I cant concentrate
Food I cant eat
Thinking of you is all I did

A month has passed since you drop the bombshell
That you cant be with me
That you only want me as a friend

Our meeting at Omni theatre was beautiful
A memory I will never forget
But our last meeting was painful
With you leaving me at Bugis with your mind set

I am sure life is back to normal for you
While I am still putting back the broken pieces of my heart
Don't know if it could ever be mended
To the time like before

You are the man of my dream
You always make me smile like a beam
But you left me limp
When you left me at the ream

Unhappiness Revealed

Madness in life
The mind becomes a guide
To the soul
Of immortality
For the carriage past
With just a speck of dust

Swelling the ground
The the sides mount
The day heads
By the beds
That know no hates
For the living deads

Taufiq

Things happen for a reason
And God wants us to meet
U justified my feelings
For you reciprocate
In the end, its me you left
Qualms about leaving
Just not in your existence
U threw me like hay
Maybe I am seen as one
Appreciative of your friendship
How can I may

The end

The end of an eight year relationship

We started as friends
Eight years to be exact
It blossomed at fifth year
But now I know not on your part

If I could changed that trends
To three years back
I will keep that fear
And not put you in my heart

I am tired

Tired of explaning
Tired of asking
Tired of convincing
Tired of concluding

You said one thing
You do another
I am tired
But I am still believing

I wish you could be stronger
Before I show this anger
If you keep this longer
I will end a lone ranger

Will you try
Coz this is making me cry
My fear is running dry
With your lie

Please try to understand
This pain I have inside
Keeping the plan
When you abide

The longer it takes
The worst it aches
I have trown myself in the lake
With the cofession I make

What is life without love

We often wonder whether we can live without love
We often underestimate our ability to love
We oten cover the blunder of our life and love
And become a hunter in our own love

A Hope In the Relationship

It started a while back
Eight years to be exact
It feels unreal
The Civilian World War Memorial
Though we didn't feel
And then a meal
Our friendship begin

Five years, we are friends
Never crossed the unintends
One day I had to rend
A shoulder of yours I lend

Never knew that things would change
To a different range
Initially it was strange
But after a while it felt like destiny, prearranged

Like you said, the cinema was when we held hands
Though we were unsure how we would expand
I hope we will be able to withstand
And they will understand

Three years into this that we create
And I hope we will eventually conjugate
This feeling I have for you will inflate
As we procreate

Im praying hard it happens
As our feelings deepens

Not much impression left behind
After the meeting
But friendship stayed on
Though no meetings till the dawn

Creation

It you who creates it
This little joy
Its you who detroys it
This bundle boy

What is done
Is forgotten
What is won
Is taken

Have you lost
The meaning of life
With a high cost
When you go for the dive

Don't kill it
To keep the kit
You've got to give a hit
And let the fire lit

For them you need to
Coz they depend on you

Wired

Gazing at the stars
Questions flow
Its moving to fast
I didnt know

I'd be nowhere
If this continues
It is unfair
Coz I'm losing the fuse

The world around me
Is still moving
I let it be
As it is too disturbing

What's there to express
When everything is done
Trying to keep abreast
With putting my head with a gun

Trying but failing
To overcome it
Buying but losing
To reach the bit

Crossroads

Stood at the crossroads
Cold and confused
Amidst the people
The stretch between east and west

One a reality, the other from the virtual world
A reality that never sets in, and a virtuality of facts

Tired of rolling the dice
And counter on luck
Decide to walk alone
Across this journey

A note for my love

Goodbye my friend
Goodbye my lover
We are destined to meet and part
Leaving is no longer new
I will go where I can find peace
I need peace
I need love
You win
I no longer needed this
I tried to be good
I tried to be second best
I tried to be the last option
But I couldnt take it anymore

So goodbye my friend
Goodbye my lover

Dead Soul

Tears flowed
But had to be hidden
Pain felt
But too hurt to be beaten

What should be done?
The painkillers don't keep it away
The ache too deep
I have known none

I want to give up
I want to let go
But I can't

God,
I need the strength
For I have failed in life
I have tried what I forbided
I have gone to hell

I need a reason to keep on living
For life is too meaningless
I need an antidote to this sore
For I feel worthless

How do you know he cares?

He says "we" instead of "I"
He wants to talk to you
He is able to make you laugh
He doesn't laugh at you, He laughs with you
He comforts you when you sad
He remembers things about you without you telling him
If you cry, he offers a shoulder without being sexual
He talks about the future of both of you together
He wants to meet you
He introduces you to his mum
He wants to meet your family
He compliments you on your look
His friends know who you are

Off course, the list continues...

Peak of Stress

I am at the peak of my stress mode. Many questions in my head. Are my students ready? Can they sit for the paper confidently? Will they pass or fail? What if they fail? Does that mean I am a bad teacher? Does it mean I had not given them enough remedials? Should I try to give them more remedials? How much more? Gosh.......I am stressed. I hope my students can make it. Please, let them remember all the things taught to them.

The Event

Glory days are back to stay
It marks the way of living
Looking forward and awaited for far too long
Eventually it is coming
Gathering of minds and souls
Venturing to new beginnings
Exploring the options
So fun it is!
Let the fun begins...

Today

Today, I am learning to accept
I am learning to forget
I am also learning to let go

Today, I hope things are better
I hope it will be okay
I also hope I am stronger

Today, I am staying happy
I am staying positive
I am also staying healthy

Today, I am avoiding pressure
I am avoiding stress
I am also avoiding anger

Just

No apprehension
Just broken
No care
Just desire
No effort
Just forgery
No grins
Just happiness
No jokes
Just kindness
No lamenting
No mimicry

Nonetity
Not open
Just partnership

Quarrels
No relationship
Just severe
No tension
Just unmoving
No vengence
Just withering
No yakking
Just zonked

Pretender

I can't stand the her, so pretentious. Dislike her . I don't know why I dislike her even more. I have been very accomodating but no more of such. Days of being nice is over!

How do you let go

This time go for it? But how? How do you let go of someone you love? Especially if it has been 8 years! You have tried your best, patience, well, its definitely your game but even that is running out. Whats your plan is not his? So why be stuck in it?

Its always easier said than done. Many has said let go!Acknowledge the end! Accept there's no future and reestablish life! But how?! How to do that when you are feeling so miserable?

Well everything happens for a reason. Accept
that reality, move forward, plan for your future!

But how to forget the past when it is there before you?!

Let go! Free yourself from the hurt!

More pics of Lombok

Lombok Pics

Lombok Here I come

I am going LOMBOK...yeah....bored and sick of my life here....If I can go far on my own, I would have done it! Stay away and be far and be happy for at least a month! But too bad, I can't. So this short trip is fine!

Point of no return

Time and again I told you its over
Time and again I took cover
By thinking you are the perfect lover

Time and again you hurt me
Time and again I let it be

I'm tired of the cry
My patience is running dry

The only thing that is keeping me strong
Is this love I have inside

How long more can I endure
That I can't tell for sure
Thought this love we have is pure
You have tinted it to a point of no cure

Teacher

I want to be a teacher
Who will be a giver
It is not about getting richer
But about helping the weaker
I want to be a teacher
Who can be a motivator

Tuesday

Today is Tuesday
I started the day
Feeling gay
But you treated me like hay

Come what may
I'l make sure I don't pay
By keeping at bay
And stop the play

I thought you'd stay
That's what you say
So I just followed you way
But I see that I am heading for the slay

2001 to 2008

Dislikes when first met
Won't last was the bet
Mind was already set
That you would be thrown off the jet

But stayed as friends we did
I think I did my fair bit
To keep up the lid
And we really hit

What was friendship has changed
Into something strange
We went out of range
And put me in lange

An ultimatum I have decided
To leave coz I am jaded
The dreams I had had faded
With my heart embedded

A Glare

You said you can't say it
I know you aren't
Trying to force you to say it
Is something I can't

I have made a choice
Through the coy
I am creating all the joys
Thinking it is just a toy

I know I have said it before
And its a real bore
I need to get to the core
Before I walk out of the door

Friends, we are
Who have crossed the bar
A game that went to far
Have created the friendship
Ajar

Before it is too late
And leaving it to fate
I am opening the gate
And let go all the hate

It is clear
My dear
Of your fear
To set the gear

Coz love is not there
And you dont dare
Coz it may not be fair
As it is a glare
That you dont care

What is Happening

Why have I not been updating?
Coz so much had happened
And I lost count of them

Time is not on my side
It only makes me tired
Thinking of tomorrow

Why must tomorrow comes
When I am still unhappy of today

Celebrate Living

Why are we sad of small matter
When they tried so hard to live
Why do we keep complaining
When they are happy to see the day

Are we ever thankful of life?
When they struggle for theirs
Are we appreciative of our surroundings?
When they work hard to stay living

Travelogue: Bukit Tinggi Colmar Tropicale

I didnt get a chance to go far as I only had a short freetime due to my 'maid' duties. So I went to Bukit Tinggi and Kuala Lumpur in Malaysia instead with my friends and my sis. We set off at about 8 am. But reach KL at 4 pm. Super long journey. Pretty tiring too. Then we set off to Bt Tinggi after that. The place was really beautiful

Love

Maybe one day, you'd love me the way I loved
Maybe one day, you care the way I cared
Maybe one day you'd be missing me
Coz I will no longer be there

Maybe one day, you'd want me the way I wanted you
Maybe one day, you'd cry for me the way I cried for you
But maybe on that day,
I will not be there for you
Coz maybe that day, I do not want you

Love or love lost?

If you love it let it go, if it never comes back, it was never meant to be. Is this true?

Quotes

Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It does not take offense and is not resentful."

Nothing hurts more than realizing he meant everything to you, but you meant nothing to him.

It’s hard to tell your mind to stop loving someone when your heart still does.

Trying to forget someone you love is like trying to remember someone you never knew.

The worst way to love someone is to sit next to them, knowing they don’t love you back.

Why is the heart the most important organ if it breaks so easily?

I don’t run from you, I walk away slowly, and it kills me knowing you don’t care enough to stop me…

I am quick to give my heart away so you took it and throw it away quickly

Where there is LOVE, there is HURT.

Never make someone your everything, because if you lose them, you have nothing.

Why do I keep coming back to you?
Because iIam a fool that believes in hope

Memories

Looking back
This beautiful memory
Will stay deep in my heart

I may keep myself in this fantasy world
But the reality wakes me up everytime
I've invested a lot of time
With nothing in return
Only an illusion

The days we had are good
But I can't have the memories haunting me
So I'm backing off

Surely
These memories are preserved
Deep in this heart of mine
You will be there
Forever

A maze

Look me up when you are dizzy,
When everything is fuzzy,

But when between us is hazy.
The solution is easy,
Am I so mousy?

Are you that crazy
That act is gauzy
Because you are lazy,
So it's cozy
To leave when you are busy
And leave everything misty?

Well, I know I am a nobody,
Just to make them happy
You'd listen to everybody,
And leave me looking sappy?

What is wrong with life?

Oh God, I am so not looking forward to Monday when I will have to take up the duties of my maid for 3 weeks. It is rather sad and miserable to spend the holidays like that. But I dont have a choice.

Oh God, why must it be that way? Am I not destined to be happy? Am I that bad a person that I must stay unhappy all the time?

Oh God, could this be a sign that I should let go? And learn to focus on whats there and not what's not around?

Oh God. I know I should stop questioning. I asked too many questions, all of which have no definite answer.

Male Versus Female

Male Versus Female Jokes
The difference between men and women:A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out the window and yells: "PIG"!!
The man immediately leans out his window and replies with "B-----!"
They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner he slams into a pig in the middle of the road.

Thats just an opening joke. On a serious front, are there glaring differences between the two genders?

I have identified some difference and have taken the liberty to look them up in different websites and compile it here.

Differences
1. Men are stronger than women
Women are actually biologically stronger than men, especially in the first few years of their lives. More males die before born than females. Delevopmentally, males lag behind and men die early than women all over the world.

2. Males are more intelligent than females
Based on a finding, it is true, but there's a disclaimer as the research is done by a man. He claimed that men are five points ahead on IQ test during the adulthood stage. Men are more likely to win Nobel prizes and achieve excellence simply because they are more intelligent than women, according to a controversial male academic.

3. Men's brains are larger, but as they age, they also shrink faster than women's brains.
This may account, scientists say, for the fact that there are many more male mathematicians, airplane pilots, bush guides, mechanical engineers, architects and race car drivers than female ones. On the other hand, women are better than men in human relations, recognizing emotional overtones in others and in language, emotional and artistic expressiveness, esthetic appreciation, verbal language and carrying out detailed and pre-planned tasks. For example, women generally can recall lists of words or paragraphs of text better than men

4. Women use more of their brains when they think.
Women use the whole brain for activities but men halved that.

5. Women talk more than men.
Women talk almost three times as much as men, with the average woman chalking up 20,000 words in a day - 13,000 more than the average man. Researchers have found that connecting with another through talking will trigger the pleasure centers in a woman's brain, a high second only to an orgasm. And, if that wasn't enough, the simple act of talking triggers a flood of brain chemicals which give women a rush similar to that felt by heroin addicts when they get a high.

6. Women are better at distress sound
I can't find a valid source of that.

6. Men will think about sex more often than women.
Another topic that have many controversial differences.

I am sure there are many more differences between the two genders. Like they said, Men from Mars and Women from Venus. They are totally different but yet they are happy together.

Friends

You are good friends
You look good together
But yet, there can never be anything more

Mixed generation with different concept of commitment

A: He is happy with her but yet they can't be together cause she sees lots of fault in him

B: They are happy together, but the relationship with like an affair. She is hidden everywhere.

C: She is in love with her, he sees her as a "Fun Friend".

D: They are happy together, he sees them together but he can't see himself being committed.

Have you encounter such a situation? More often than not, these are the things that happened these days, the mixed generation issue, it is called. Well, how then can we unhooked this problem and create a better understanding of the two genders? I don't have answers to all the questions. Maybe you have?

My Kids did it!

I am in high moon when I found out one of my students is offered normal acad stream. But in the midst of all the celebration, I had one kid who failed. It was so sad. Being new in this, I had problem informing him that he didn't make it. What was worst when he actually said, "You told me if I work hard, I'll pass. Why I didn't pass when the rest pass?" I was suddenly in tears. I didn't have a reply. I know he has tried his best. I have seen a lot of improvement in him. I know with the right push from the right people, this boy will be able to make it. He just needs more confidence. Today, his mother finally decided to let him repeat another year. I am glad she made that decision. I hope he will make it next year. I've told him to approach me anytime if he needs help. I hope and pray I wont be too busy and be there for him. I want to ensure this kid make it next year.

To my student, Wei Lin, congrats. I am happy with your achievement. I want you to continue to work as hard and achieve your dreams, whatever it takes, perservere and move on. Always remember the fighting spirit.." DIE DIE MUST TRY". Never give up. To the rest, strive harder, the road may be a little bit longer and harder, but that does not mean it is close. It will be open as long as you continue to drive and push your way up.

To all my "Kids" congrats.

A note

Holding on to an empty heart
Really shallow inside

I blame no one for the pain
Only myself to have had it retained
Though there's nothing there to gain

The misery will be over
Just needed to take cover

Only by keeping the lifeline off
Though its hard as the heart is too soft

No despair is needed
Not defeated

Only blessings when expired
And memories be transpired

Suicide Note

I was reading suicide notes from internet. No! I am not planning a suicide attempt and NO I don't have suicidal tendency. Just that sometimes when life is not heading the way I want it to be and the depressive mode is switched on, I feel better after reading such letters and notes. I may sound selfish and self-centred but these notes actually make me feel better and I will realise how minute my problem is as compared to many others. It will then hopefully make me want to be alive and achieve other aims that I've set for myself. I would then want to focus on my objectives and one of which is living itself. It also made me realised, how foolish to live life in such sadness due to such ache

But I can't imagine, if I ever write a suicide note, then what would the content be?

Wiriting one may be my triumph! And my freedom of my own pain. I will write it one of these days. Then you'd be my judge!

All the memories filled me in a throb
Pretending to be dead
Escaping from reality
But this dead heart
Still bleeds

I am an enemy to my own heart
I just need it to be lifeless
Then the pain will not clasp my heart
So I could set it free

For the first time,
Things will never be the same again
For the first time,
It marks the end

Thought it would be better
But felt battered
Pain and tattered

Drowned beneath the bane
Sinking in the rain
Trying hard to keep sane

Feels like catching the first train
As pain is even in the brain
Already feels drained

PSLE is over....at least for my students

Yessssssssssssss......exam is over! Finally. So tiring! But happy that its over. My kids are also happy. I received many smses from them....all smiles and sounded really super duper happy. In fact, I was also in high spirit today, I never felt that...for the longest time. And what time school ended today for...1030am...the earliest I've ever had...and I left right after that....It sure felt good....finally...I'm able to just go off...without feeling stress that probably I've not given my students enough remedials....I'm called perverted, remedial queen and many other names...well...I had to...I feel responsible to ensure that the kids pass their exam or at least leave the school...I don't expect others to understand...I just need to ensure myself that I have tried my best for these kids...the rest is up to them and fate...not I am leaving everything in the hands of God...pleaseeeeeeeeee....let all my 22 kids pass.

Tired

I am super tireddddddddddddddddd. Waiting for this to be over....one week...and its over. To be precise its actually 4 days before the end....my students PSLE off course!

Ramadhan Gathering:Primary School Mates

Its been sooooo many years after I graduated from Primary School. Little would I know, I would meet all these people I spent those 6 years of my life now. Last Friday, we all had a gathering. It was sweet. Many of them are married with kids, a few changes (like adding a few kilos, and totally changed outlook) while others remain the same (as jovial as ever). I was told that I didnt change much. We spent the whole three hours or so reminiscing the moments.

Thanks to Mimi (Norhamimi), who got all our contacts from various networks(mostly Friendster I suppose), we met up at Seoul Garden. It was definitely a wonderful reunion. Too bad some of them couldnt make it. If not, it would have been so much nicer.

What a day it has been!

Its listening comprehension exam. Nearly half of the teachers from my school went to this particular school. It felt good to have all the 'kakis' there. Then it was a better news when I found out I don't need to invigilate the first part of LC. But kinda bored! I should have brought my marking...urgh...would have done lots of it then. We (4 of us) spent the morning chit chatting and zoning in and out of a few small talks. Then the first LC group came. I found out I also did not need to invigilate....isnt that great! So more sitting down chit chatting nonsense with my collegaues...now minus one as she had to take over someone who was not feeling well. While chit chatting, one of my male colleagues popped up with a weird question...."Why you don't want a bf?" Huh?! Didnt know how to answer that....I think they knew I am uncomfy with the question. Finally I said I am choosy....which is true....I am choosy. So that's the end of it.

Finally the second group came back. The counting of the scripts took ages....finally we left at about 2 plus....I was too tired so I went home...and what I did at home....slept...slept...slept....felt a piglet...heehee..But felt good too...it has indeed been a tiring week for me.

Teachers' Day Celebration in School

Caught in the act

Strike a post gals!

Click that!

Something stuck...

I am glowing...